i just spit my muffin out from laughter
Tis the season to reblog the shit out of this
What are your top beauty tips?
Start out perfect and don’t change a thing. Always accentuate your best features by pointing at them. And conceal your flaws by sucker punching anyone who has the audacity to mention them.
Never too old to learn from the Muppets.
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.” - Miss Piggy
"how many times are you going to listen to that song" until the void in my heart is filled
do you ever get weirded out by the fact that everyone around you is constantly within their own mind and thinking a million secret thoughts and battling internal struggles just like you and that you’re not the only one who thinks these things and that the people around you aren’t just faces meant to fill up your life but they’re actually really deep people who have a lot more to them than you ever actually even think about
Flawless Responses to a Wrong Number Text
Get your facts straight, CNN.
If you didn’t know, Stephen Colbert is a literal expert on Lord of the Rings. He went onto the sets of one of the films and managed to beat the resident lore expert in a trivia contest. Someday he will die and Death will come, and he will live forever by challenging him to a contest of LoTR trivia.
friendly reminder that when they were making armor for the monsters in the LOTR movies colbert came on set and gave tips to improve and make them more accurate